alltheavenueslookugly

i’ll grow a long beard.

i’ll write country songs with no endings. or create my own ending. must include a big hat and a big truck and a hatred for afros.

discover a religion that fits. (someone else)

throw fits like a child.

examine a wave pattern.

i’ll fuck you.

i’ll cry.

i’ll wash my laundry.

i’ll eat everything on my plate that looks okay.

i’ll build a hammock out of band-aids and sea shells.

i’ll miss my early 1990’s mtv.

i’ll scream about the shitty things i have read about people with mental illness after the horrible shootings in CT.

i’ll pet my dog while she licks my face when i am shit-stoned on my medications and feeling like there is nothing in the world worth smiling about.

smoke eleven cigarettes and make a pyramid out of whatever might be left.

sit outside and do crossword puzzles for three hrs.

write. edit. write. vomit. edit more. prepare for publication.

try and look at internet porn once a month. but watch kitties on youtube for an hour a day.

keep throwing my heart out there. see how it goes.

stop annoying my therapist, even though she looks like andre the giant’s younger sister and has no patience for me whatsoever.

fuck you, lithium.

i’ll start working out and eating better.

finish entourage.

i’ll take a road trip somewhere. anywhere. go places and relax.

i hope everyone has a good holiday. i will be spending it at the theatre and hanging out with my brother and my dog.

❤

~ by alltheavenueslookugly on 2012/12/24.

Posted in december02
Tags: bipolar disorder, depression, holiday, lists, love, therapy